BACKPACKS!

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, why are so many people wearing BACKPACKS?

My AMERICAN friends, I salute your Dick Kelty the INNOVATOR of the BACKPACK.

BUT and it’s a BIG BUT he invented it for people who go HIKING or CAMPING – NOT for short BUS rides to PORTOFINO!

A SLIGHT young man, back bent backwards by the weight of his BACKPACK and his companion was standing on our crowded bus from the train station to PORTOFINO. Every time he turned to look at the beautiful scenery out of the window he TOOK THREE PEOPLE OUT.

A FEISTY Italian lady who was in danger of missing her stop had to resort to the traditional method of a SHARP BLOW to the back of the KNEES; bringing him down on his back like an UPENDED TURTLE.

I lost COUNT of the number of TIMES I was BIFFED, BASHED or SQUISHED by the DAMN THINGS. WHAT the HECK is in the FISHING things?

Even on the PLANE, it’s a STRUGGLE to fit my SLIM SUITCASE in the OVERHEAD locker with the BULGING, MULTI POCKET, METAL TUBED, PADDED STRAPPED BACKPACK.

WHO NEEDS a BACKPACK when wandering the beautiful City of GENOA, or meandering along the SEAFRONT of PORTOFINO.

I mean one is never further than a couple of feet from WATER, FOOD, ALCOHOL or a DEFIBRILLATOR these days.

A BACKPACK is APPROPRIATE for HIKING, CAMPING or EXPLORING in the WILD.

If you need a bag, why not a SHOULDER BAG suitable for EVERYONE.

When you are about to leave the house with HALF the HOUSE, ASK YOURSELF…….DO I NEED THIS LETHAL WEAPON ON MY BACK?

Yours Grumpily

Celia

 

P.S. ‘Celia Finds An Angel’

Available on http://www.amazon.com/dp/B07G68SX6J

or (UK) http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07G68SX6J

HAVE A CUP OF CHA! – It’s National Tea Day

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman here in dear old BLIGHTY it is NATIONAL TEA DAY, so I invite you all to SHARE A CUP OF TEA with me.

TEA is consolation when you are grieving.

TEA is sharing laughter and fun with your friends.

TEA makes you feel better when nothing else works.

TEA is refreshing when it’s hot.

TEA is warming when it’s cold.

TEA comes in many guises.

TEA should be FAIR TRADE.

TEA who doesn’t love a cuppa?

This is a picture of my lovely mum and her lovely sister taking tea in the garden in the 1950’s

Just a normal tea for them but look at the teapot, hot water jug, bone-china teacups and saucers, plates of triangled bread and butter,  jam in a dish, sliced homemade cake and a proper tablecloth pegged to the table.

So much better than a teabag in a mug.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yours Tea-ily,

Celia

MOUSES MAYHEM & MUSINGS

MOUSES MAYHEM & MUSINGS, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman what a day it has been and it’s only 4.0’clock!

I had planned a full day of WRITING, interspersed with homemade SOUP and followed by a PANTOMIME rehearsal this evening.

Instead I heard a whoosh and DISCOVERED WATER from the DISHWASHER pouring into the cupboard under the sink.

At the same time I DISCOVERED MOUSE DROPPINGS under the sink.

Ronald DISCOVERED a MOUSE had chewed a HOLE in the DISHWASHER pipe.

Ronald went to buy a new pipe for the DISHWASHER.

I walked the two FURBABIES in the SNOW. We were about 2/3rds of the way around the village when the LEAD broke on our new little RESCUE Polly.

Polly was rescued from a PUPPY FARM and has LOTS to LEARN, like her NAME, RECALL, SIT, etc, at present her DEFAULT walk is to KEEP GOING.

The good news is POLLY is SAFE, DISHWASHER is WORKING, WATER mopped up, DROPPINGS cleared.

I’m TEMPTED to put some CHEESE down, I’d prefer they ate that next time.

Yours Mousily

Celia

SPAM-BOT ON THE LOOSE!

SPAM-BOT ON THE LOOSE!

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman who knew? I’ve never heard of a SPAM-BOT but apparently there is one on the LOOSE.

And it’s not Ronald’s DERRIERE after too many SPAM FRITTERS!

I have been BOMBARDED with new SPAM followers from a NEW BOT but the wonderful HAPPINESS ENGINEERS at WORDPRESS are working hard on BLOCKING them.

Yours Bottily

Celia

P.S. Just a reminder that this WONDERFUL book ‘CELIA LADYGARDEN AND THE CURIOUS CURIOSITY’ is available on AMAZON. It’s all about an INCIDENT that happened in our little North Devon village, of course dear ladies and occasional gentleman, I am the HEROINE.

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These are great short stories by my dear friend and co-author, also available on AMAZON.

Copy of Little Red & Other Stories (4)