MELLOW LELLO, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman is just the right phrase.

Livraria Lello is the correct name for this wonderful bookshop.

If you are ever in PORTO,  do take the time for a visit, it is well worth it.

However my dears,  I would advise that you visit before partaking of any ALCOHOLIC BEVERIDGES.

The surreal staircases (think Harry Potter) are not to be tackled after imbibing LIQUID REFRESHMENTS.

I managed to ascend the first flight but on reaching that first SUMMIT. and having to decide to either turn left or right for the next flight, (I’m sure those stairs were moving) I FROZE.

Ronald who had already reached the top luckily peered over the balcony and spotted me on HANDS and KNEES, completely BLOCKING the stairs with a waiting group of camera snapping JAPANESE tourists behind me.

The only way was up and with Ronald’s support and eyes closed I made it.

I don’t think I can put all the blame on the PORT, I am just not very good with heights.

Yours Vertigoly


p.s. Thank you to all my dear ladies and occasional gentleman who have purchased my new book.


wp-1485439903944.jpgwp-1485440263315.jpgMy dear ladies and occasional gentleman, if you consider a little SOJOURN to OPORTO, you might consider a stay in the OPORTO COSY.

Built in the 190o’s it retains many original features, the optional breakfast is more than enough to keep you going through the day. Tea, coffee and wine can be served in your room but the best part of the GUESTHOUSE is the warm welcome and the service.

It is also great value for money.

Oporto is built on a hill running down to the river. The position of the guesthouse towards the top has a big ADVANTAGE, it means you can enjoy your, FOOD, WINE & PORT then WALK it off on the way back.

Yours Cosily


p.s. LUCKY ESCAPE, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman in the NEWS today was a story about a poor LADY who tried to drink her MINIATURE BOTTLE of VODKA on an EASY JET FLIGHT.

The flight attendants told her that she couldn’t drink it and even called the POLICE and asked for her to be ARRESTED.

Thank goodness the police had more sense and REFUSED.

I’m thinking that VERONICA and I were very LUCKY not to be ARRESTED when she FILLED Her WATER BOTTLE with VODKA & TONIC and I filled mine with GIN & TONIC and we took them on our FLIGHT to MORROCCO.


PRINCESSES, POTATOES, PORT & VERBIAGE. Sunday, another wet and windy day, I knew I shouldn’t have given Ronald extra BRUSSELL SPROUTS.

Last night was our first rehearsal for this years village PANTOMIME, ‘THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA’ which I write with certain people in mind and which I had cast, following a read-through. Problems, last night more girls turned up who want to be PRINCESSES in the panto and someone else informed me that they would not be able to be a PRINCESS after all. So I was able to fill one role with one of the extras and today I have to write some extra lines for the other two DIVAS. It’s a good job my mind is full of MISCELLANY, I should be able to come up with some NONSENSICLE VERBIAGE!

My friend Veronica telephoned me as she is full of EXCITING IDEAS for the NEW YEAR; one of which is starting her own ‘BLISS’. I will let you know more as she gets to grip with the TECHNOLOGY.

Well I am off to pour a little PORT whilst I boil the POTATOES up ready for ROASTINGROAST POTATOES. Once they are in the oven I shall leave them to Ronald he likes a good toss before dinner. He says I don’t turn over enough so he likes to do it for himself.

Yours Portingly