THE UNFURLED MOTH

THE UNFURLED MOTH? I hear you ask my dear ladies and occasional gentleman.

Well it is the latest BOOK about me and Ronald and all my dear friends in our village, not forgetting Hirsute Roley and Polly the rescue.

I don’t know how she does it but my dear friend Glenda has been scribbling away jotting down my adventures and here is the result..

Its so versatile as you can read the PAPERBACK, EBOOK or on KINDLE UNLIMITED.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B084G75HBJ

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B084G75HBJ

Yours Bookily

Celia

p.s. Sneeze into your elbows and wash your hands properly, there are some nasty germs about.

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR

HAPPY NEW YEAR my dear ladies and occasional gentleman.

Some say ‘A New Year, A New You ‘ but I’m quite happy with the old me.

So I won’t be joining a GYM, going on a DIET, or changing my HAIRSTYLE.

Anyway, it’s PANTOMIME time again and that usually BURNS off the XMAS CHOCOLATE FAT.

Yours Verymuchthesamely

Celia

p.s. My heart goes out to the Australian people and the other countries who have experienced natural disasters.

pps Here are a few of my Christmas hand knitted socks

Pppps. Good luck to those who are striving to change

APPARENTLY THIS IS AN…………….

IRON!!! Yes an IRON my dear ladies and occasional gentleman. I know!!! It looks more like …. Well I’m not sure really.

I have a lovely new FRIEND and he was very EXCITED about the purchase of this SPACE-AGE iron.

Speaking as a lady who hasn’t used one of these in over 20 years, I’m CONFUSED.

Yours Flatly

Celia

A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, there have been a SERIES of UNFORTUNATE EVENTS.

We were looking after our son’s dogs when UNFORTUNATELY the puppy JUMPED Ronald’s BARRIER of ladders on top of the garden wall and LEAPT into the field with the BULLOCKS.

 I slipped on my WELLINGTONS whilst YELLING at Ronald (who was in bed drinking tea) and made my way in my DRESSING GOWN along the road and down the lane. 

I thought RONALD was following me to the FIELD-GATE but I heard a COMMOTION and Roley barking in distress.

Ronald had decided in his WISDOM to follow the dog and JUMP over into the field.

UNFORTUNATELY as he LEAPT he caught his leg on the BARBED WIRE fence, to steady himself he REACHED and GRABBED the LADDER  which then LANDED ON TOP of him.

FORTUNATELY the weight of it disengaged his leg from the BARBED WIRE.

UNFORTUNATELY he fell into a VAST pile of COW SHIT.

FORTUNATELY it was a soft landing.

UNFORTUNATELY he received numerous PUNCTURES, CUTS bruises and a possible BROKEN RIB.

FORTUNATELY the dog came to me and slid under the field-gate.

The MORAL of the story THINK before you LEAP.

Yours Fortunately

Celia

THE FLIP SIDE

THE FLIP SIDE my dear ladies and occasional gentleman is this.

When your DELIGHTFUL granddaughter smooths your hair away keeping her little hands holding your face and says,

“YOU LOOK REALLY PRETTY WITH YOUR HAIR LIKE THAT GRANNY.”

The FLIP SIDE – ten minutes later,

“GRANNY WHY HAVE YOU GOT TWO CHINS?”

Here she is COMMUNING with the COWS, temporary ladder in place to prevent her JOINING them.

CELIA FINDS AN ANGEL

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, my dear author friend has written another cracking book about me. Here’s the book and a few words from her. So proud.


SUPER SPECIAL SUNDAY

I’m so excited to share with you…….

CELIA FINDS AN ANGEL published today as an ebook on Amazon.
Paperback to follow shortly.
This story will whisk you away to caper like a spring lamb through a small Devon village. Strong female characters take the lead in this funny and at times moving tale.
I hope you enjoy reading this book as much as I loved writing it. The idea for the story started at a parish history exhibition at our local church, here in North Devon.
~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m downloading it on my Kindle Fire as we speak.

Yours Excitedly

Celia

DOUBLE GUSSETS FOR SIR TOM JONES

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman ‘IT LOOKS LIKE’ I am off to see SIR TOM JONES ‘IN A FIELD OF YELLOW DAISYS’ at Powderham castle!!!

‘I KNOW’ I’m going to get ‘FUNNY FAMILIAR FORGOTTEN FEELINGS’ so ”IT’S NOT UNUSUAL ‘ for me to be wearing my DOUBLE GUSSET SILK KNICKERS.

Tom, ‘WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT’? Well ‘ SHE’S A LADY’, Celia, in ‘THE GREEN GREEN GRASS OF THE LADYGARDEN HOME’.

Tom ‘SEX BOMB’ ‘I KNOW’ ‘YOU NEED LOVE LIKE I DO’, ‘I CAN’T GET NO SATISFACTION ‘.

‘AT THIS MOMENT’ ‘ARE YOU GONNA GO MY WAY’ and ‘LOVE ME TONIGHT’?

‘MAMA TOLD ME NOT TO COME’ (thank God for double gussets) but ‘ALL I EVER NEED IS YOU’

Tom, ‘YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU BEEN MISSING’, ‘I’M COMING HOME’ for your ‘KISS’

Yours ‘DELILAHLY’

Celia

SPAM-BOT ON THE LOOSE!

SPAM-BOT ON THE LOOSE!

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman who knew? I’ve never heard of a SPAM-BOT but apparently there is one on the LOOSE.

And it’s not Ronald’s DERRIERE after too many SPAM FRITTERS!

I have been BOMBARDED with new SPAM followers from a NEW BOT but the wonderful HAPPINESS ENGINEERS at WORDPRESS are working hard on BLOCKING them.

Yours Bottily

Celia

P.S. Just a reminder that this WONDERFUL book ‘CELIA LADYGARDEN AND THE CURIOUS CURIOSITY’ is available on AMAZON. It’s all about an INCIDENT that happened in our little North Devon village, of course dear ladies and occasional gentleman, I am the HEROINE.

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These are great short stories by my dear friend and co-author, also available on AMAZON.

Copy of Little Red & Other Stories (4)

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