THE FLIP SIDE

THE FLIP SIDE my dear ladies and occasional gentleman is this.

When your DELIGHTFUL granddaughter smooths your hair away keeping her little hands holding your face and says,

“YOU LOOK REALLY PRETTY WITH YOUR HAIR LIKE THAT GRANNY.”

The FLIP SIDE – ten minutes later,

“GRANNY WHY HAVE YOU GOT TWO CHINS?”

Here she is COMMUNING with the COWS, temporary ladder in place to prevent her JOINING them.

 MOOOOOO! MOOOOOO! ACROPHOBIA (Translated) HELP! HELP! ACROPHOBIA

MOOOOOO! MOOOOOO! ACROPHOBIA. (Translated) HELP! HELP! ACROPHOBIA. My dear ladies and occasional gentleman this was the cry we heard (in BOVINE language) from the field next to our garden.


This chap had decided to CLIMB up on top of the hedge. Once up there he decided he didn’t like it and wanted to come down. 

So typical of a man, it takes all that effort to get up and only minutes to come down.


His FRIENDS tried to encourage him down but after managing to turn around he had frozen.

But don’t worry folks, like DOCTOR DOOLITTLE I can talk to the animals. 


Using my SPECIAL COW TALK (Ronald often remarks on my similarity) I was able to COAX the poor animal down.

Yours Bullocky

Celia

HIDE AND SEEK AND HIDE THE SAUSAGE

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, as you can see Hirsute Roley had great fun today playing HIDE AND SEEK with the neighbours.

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Ronald had been busy digging over a piece of garden for me. When I pointed out I needed the soil finer there was a bit of GRUMPING.

He cheered up watching Hirsute Roley and called out, ” when I’ve finished PAINT-ROLLING this earth, why don’t we play HIDE THE SAUSAGE?”

I expect like me this is a new game to you. I’m not sure if we need a DICE.

Yours Gamily

Celia

 

DO DOGS DO PERSPECTIVE?

DO DOGS DO PERSPECTIVE?
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Hirsute Roley having a post breakfast cuddle on my lap, started barking at a far field where the cows were racing from one side of the field to the other.

Ronald remarked “does he know they’re cows or do they look like dogs to him from this distance?

After reading several articles it appears he may well be seeing them as dogs! Roley along with most dogs sees more movement than size.

If only this applied to humans my dear ladies and occasional gentleman. If we were feeling a little plump, we could just keep moving slightly and everyone would only see the movement and not our expanding waistline.

Men when they wanted to appear bigger would just keep still.

Yours Movingly

Celia

BULLS, BELLS & EXPLOSIONS

BULLS, BELLS & EXPLOSIONS 

Oh what a night! The RAIN was lashing down, the WIND was howling when all of a sudden an incredible EXPLOSION of sound accompanied a sky-illuminating FLASH, followed by BALL LIGHTNING bouncing across the field, scattering the poor BULL and his CONCUBINES. 

Our power went off and I ran out to make sure the poor beasts were OK or if I needed to call the Farmer. They were terrified and making distressed noises, I called to them and tried to calm them down as they huddled together against the fence, the great Bull’s shoulders heaving with fear, the cows pushing against his flanks.

The next minute I’m woken up by the sound of the CHURCH BELLS ringing out.

“Ronald WAKE-UP! the church bells are ringing it must mean somethings happened, WAKE-UP!

All I could think was that the LIGHTNING  must have started a fire in the village and the church bells were ringing out a warning.

“What? I can’t hear anything”

“The Bells, the church bells!” I realise now I must have sounded like QUASIMODO.

“Silence that’s all I can hear, you must have been dreaming”

Of course I wasn’t dreaming. I get up and open the window – SILENCE – I couldn’t believe it – SILENCE. I went through to the sitting room and looked out of the window with the torch – NO COWS. I remembered then they had been taken in for the winter. By the time I climbed back into bed even little hirsute Roley had woken up and climbed onto the bed, hiding under the comforter wondering what the heck was going on.

“Sorry, it all seemed so real, the lightning, the bells”  I don’t know if it was something I had eaten before I went to bed, or if it was watching the news with its warning of loss of life due to HIGH TIDES, HIGH WINDS AND MORE RAIN. 

Ronald wasn’t amused at first “It will take me hours to go back to sleep now” but then he saw the funny side thankf…….zzzzzzzzzzzzz

Yours Sleepily

Celia

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