SUMMER NIPPLE ALERT? Well you may ask my dear ladies and occasional gentleman.
It’s SUMMER and we are all wearing our SUMMER JEWELLERY.
The lovely silver BRACELET in the picture, nearly SLICED my NIPPLE off whilst I was sleeping!
REMEMBER TO REMOVE BEFORE BEDTIME!
CELIA & VERONICA ON THE ROAD TO MARRAKECH. Yes my dear ladies and occasional gentleman my dear friend Veronica and I are off on an ADVENTURE to MARRAKECH.
Why? You may ask. Well we are FLYING there for a BIRTHDAY PARTY for one of our fellow FANNYS. We are so HOLLYWOOD!
I’m hoping for a new MOROCCAN CARPET for the sitting room. My thinking is I could get a lovely one in EXCHANGE for my dear friend VERONICA, who is a BLONDE-HAIRED, BLUE-EYED, CURVACIOUS LADY.
After all who wants a camel?
p.s. Come to think of it there is a resemblance. I think it’s the smile.
KEEPING WITH THE FISH THEME. My dear ladies and occasional gentleman isn’t it interesting that the Scottish people are keeping with the fish theme, going from SALMOND TO STURGEON.
A QUICK JUMP my dear ladies and occasional gentleman, wasn’t what I was expecting when Ronald invited me into the SUMMERHOUSE this morning for a cup of COFFEE but no sooner had I sat down when this GIANT GRASSHOPPER JUMPED!
FRUSTRATION! Dear ladies and the occasional gentleman, is it just me or do you also get FRUSTRATED?
I HATE going to the DOCTORS and will avoid it at all costs but sometimes it is inevitable. I GIRDED MY LOINS and rang to make an appointment, this is how it went.
“Doctors surgery, xxxxxxx here how can I help you?”
“I would like to make an appointment to see Dr xxxxxx”
“Dr xxxx is in today but I cannot make you an appointment”
” Is she in tomorrow?”
“Can I make an appointment please”
“Oh why is that?”
“You need to ring at 8.00am tomorrow and try to book one of the available slots”
“Can’t I make the appointment now?”
“No, you need to ring in the morning”
The next morning I duly rang at 8.00am. Unfortunately the WHOLE WORLD & HIS WIFE was also ringing to make one of the ELUSIVE available slots.
Is it just me or do you also experience the FRUSTRATION of trying to see a DOCTOR?
THE FASTEST ERECTION IS POETRY IN MOTION, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman.My friends and I are organising a VINTAGE style FETE and CRAFT FAYRE. The big EVENT is tomorrow!
The lovely gentlemen from THE GREAT TORRINGTON CAVELIERS arrived last evening and like POETRY IN MOTION performed the FASTEST ERECTION it has been my honour to witness.
Here they are in ACTION.
SOMETHING FISHY IN THE LADYGARDEN! Yes my dear ladies and occasional gentleman I must confess to there being something fishy in the LADYGARDEN.
But WHERE was it and more importantly WHAT was it?
I first noticed it in the kitchen and after following the SCENT like a BLOODHOUND, I realised I had to VENTURE further. Into the UTILITY room.
It had a distinctly FISHY AROMA which stopped me DEAD!
Was I FOLLOWING the SCENT or was the SCENT FOLLOWING me?
Oh the RELIEF when I spotted the CULPRITS.
Oh the things you do for your GRANDCHILDREN.
These CACOTOPIA CANCRIFORMS have been removed from the premises!