BRIAN GETS HIS SAUSAGE OUT!
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, it was all quiet and not a lot happening when Veronica and I arrived at the CRAFTS AND FARMERS MARKET this morning. Although we were very pleased to see a rather JOLLY mobile HABERDASHERY van parked outside.
We entered and were strolling up the EAST aisle when SIMULTANEOUSLY a CRACKLE of electricity filled the air as a RUMOUR ROLLED around the hall that Brian was getting his SAUSAGE OUT. All the other ladies PERKED up and made a BEELINE for the WEST aisle.
Now I know I’m her FRIEND but all I’m saying is I wouldn’t get between Veronica and a SAUSAGE!. Elbows flying she had pushed her way to the front of the queue and had FLUNG several LARGE CHUNKS of SAUSAGE, of different VARIETIES, followed by a piece of VINTAGE CHEDDAR down her THROAT before Brian and the rest of the ladies could say BLACK CRACKED PEPPER.
Too much meat made her a little fiery and she proceeded to HARANGUE the BREAD man because he had put PRUNES in his MULTI-SEEDED LOAF!