A LITTLE BIT OF DICK!

IT’S PANTOMIME TIME AGAIN – OH NO IT ISN’T – OH YES IT IS, dear ladies and occasional gentleman, ST URITH’s is bracing itself for a little bit of DICK – WHITTINGTON that is.

It was dress rehearsal last night, oh what larks.

Gertie lost her (his) wig and grabbed a substitute that looked like a PINK BUSH that was distinctly in need of a good TRIM.

The DAME put his DRESS on and after I had pinned him in realized he had his VEST on underneath and he hadn’t put his BRASSIERE on!


With a complicated manouvre he extracted  the VEST without removing the DRESS, stuffed his FAKE BOOBS down his front and tossed his BLUE BRASSIERE aside.

Needless to say they DIDN’T stay in place during the rigors of THE SALSA. I think he’s learned a lesson all of us should adhere too.

BRASSIERE ON BEFORE DRESS.

Curtain up Thursday and under the gaze of ST GENESIUS let us perform well.

Yours Stagily

Celia

P.S. Exciting news the BOOK is PUBLISHED, my dear little ghost-writer friend has scribbled away as I dictated one of my little ADVENTURES. I do hope you enjoy my little ROMP in the CRIMINAL world. It is available on AMAZON, here is a link, I think? Celia
Celia Ladygarden

MELLOW LELLO

MELLOW LELLO, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman is just the right phrase.

Livraria Lello is the correct name for this wonderful bookshop.

If you are ever in PORTO,  do take the time for a visit, it is well worth it.

However my dears,  I would advise that you visit before partaking of any ALCOHOLIC BEVERIDGES.

The surreal staircases (think Harry Potter) are not to be tackled after imbibing LIQUID REFRESHMENTS.

I managed to ascend the first flight but on reaching that first SUMMIT. and having to decide to either turn left or right for the next flight, (I’m sure those stairs were moving) I FROZE.

Ronald who had already reached the top luckily peered over the balcony and spotted me on HANDS and KNEES, completely BLOCKING the stairs with a waiting group of camera snapping JAPANESE tourists behind me.

The only way was up and with Ronald’s support and eyes closed I made it.

I don’t think I can put all the blame on the PORT, I am just not very good with heights.

Yours Vertigoly

Celia

p.s. Thank you to all my dear ladies and occasional gentleman who have purchased my new book.

COSY IN OPORTO & A LUCKY ESCAPE

wp-1485439903944.jpgwp-1485440263315.jpgMy dear ladies and occasional gentleman, if you consider a little SOJOURN to OPORTO, you might consider a stay in the OPORTO COSY.

Built in the 190o’s it retains many original features, the optional breakfast is more than enough to keep you going through the day. Tea, coffee and wine can be served in your room but the best part of the GUESTHOUSE is the warm welcome and the service.

It is also great value for money.

Oporto is built on a hill running down to the river. The position of the guesthouse towards the top has a big ADVANTAGE, it means you can enjoy your, FOOD, WINE & PORT then WALK it off on the way back.

Yours Cosily

Celia

p.s. LUCKY ESCAPE, my dear ladies and occasional gentleman in the NEWS today was a story about a poor LADY who tried to drink her MINIATURE BOTTLE of VODKA on an EASY JET FLIGHT.

The flight attendants told her that she couldn’t drink it and even called the POLICE and asked for her to be ARRESTED.

Thank goodness the police had more sense and REFUSED.

I’m thinking that VERONICA and I were very LUCKY not to be ARRESTED when she FILLED Her WATER BOTTLE with VODKA & TONIC and I filled mine with GIN & TONIC and we took them on our FLIGHT to MORROCCO.

READ ALL ABOUT IT! BREAKING NEWS!

READ ALL ABOUT IT! BREAKING NEWS!

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, today is an auspicious day, it is my late mothers birthday, bless her.

So as a present to her this is the perfect day for publishing my first book.


I have been working in collaboration with my dear friend Glenda who has written about one of my MOMENTOUS ADVENTURES.

Now I am not sure if this is the done thing or correct ETIQUETTE for putting on ones ‘BLISS’ so forgive me.

I’m just hoping that my fellow villagers like their moment of FAME.

Yours Publishy

Celia

p.s. Please don’t feel a obliged but the book is on AMAZON as an ebook, paperback to follow shortly. C x

VINO! VINO! FUNICULAR

Vino! Vino!

My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, one of the highlights of our OPORTO holiday was visiting the PORT side of the RIO DOURO.

We traveled down to the PONTE LUIS by FUNICULAR.

I must say as we went over the drop, rather like a slow ROLLER-COASTER, my FUNICULAR tightened!

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The walk across the bridge on the two person path with competition for space from passing pedestrians, buses and cars alongside is HAIRY enough to make you DESPERATE for an ALCOHOLIC BEVERIDGE! Although it is handy having the odd WING-MIRROR to apply fresh LIP-BALM!

From the VILA NOVA DE GAIA there is a wonderful view across the river to the RIBEIRA district and the CATHEDRAL reaching towards the sky.

 

Traditional ROBELO boats UNIQUE to the DOURO region that carry PORT and other goods along the river.

WHITE PORT, chilled 3 euros for TWO glasses of DELICIOUSNESS, enjoyed in a small, friendly local bar. SEVERAL TIMES!

 

The FABULOUS PORTO AUGUSTOS, one of only three remaining Portuguese PORT businesses. If you only visit one cellar and a WINE TASTING, forget the big boys, TAYLORS, COCKBURNS, SANDEMANS etc., treat yourself to a visit here. Up a little side street and at only 5 euros for the tour and a wine tasting, which is deducted from the price of a purchase if made and who wouldn’t.

The tour was informative, interesting, funny and delivered with enthusiasm by a member of the family; she was clearly a  PORT WINE lover. The tasting was fun and a treat to the taste-buds. Our kind guide brought us EXTRAS, it would have been rude to refuse so we ploughed on with VINTAGE WHITES, TAWNYS and REDS.

We chose a 20 ANOS TINTO, full of flavours with hints of WALNUTS and VANILLA, delicious.

Yours Portily

Celia

 

PORTO AUGUSTOS website: http://www.portoaugustos.pt/

 

 

 

PLEASING PORTO PLACES

PLEASING PORTO PLACES. 

Yes my dear ladies and occasional gentleman OPORTO is WELL WORTH a visit. There certainly were some lovely and interesting buildings.


And the best bit you can WALK to most of them.

That means you can soak up the ATMOSPHERE and  you don’t miss anything.

I lost Ronald for a moment, he was checking what was on at the CINEMA.


Yours Architecturely

Celia

CAMEL SLOBBER? FRANCESINHA?

CAMEL SLOBBER? My dear ladies and gentleman needless to say Ronald and I did not choose this desert whilst in PORTO.


This is one speciality FRANCESINHA! Which we managed to avoid.


I promise to talk about the lovelier parts of PORTO and our holiday. In fact I’ll start now.

This dear little PARK was just outside our lovely 1900’s GUEST HOUSE.


What a BREAKFAST to line our tummies with before starting on the PORT.


Yours Avoidingly

Celia