Did you see us at the OSCARS, myself and Veronica? We were there.

We had been NOMINATED for our two SHORT FILMS how exciting. It was a bit of a rush to get there after our FORAGING SUNDAY. But I am sure my dear ladies and occasional gentlemen if you had been nominated, you would have made every effort to get there.

We just managed to make the RED CARPET but as we were late no pictures I am afraid. Which is a shame because I had managed to remove Veronica’s FLYING DUCK SWEATSHIRT and get her into a FROCK for a change!

I was wearing a little number that Mrs Smithers had run up for me to my OWN DESIGN. You can never go wrong with GREEN FLOCKING and I wanted to change the sitting room CURTAINS anyway. There was one awkward moment just as WILL SMITH entered the stage, I crossed my legs and discovered a CURTAIN HOOK which had worked its way down the inside of my tights. I don’t think WILL noticed.

The other disappointment was missing out on THE SELFIE. We became stuck at the back with LISA MINELLI. If you look carefully you can see my right shoulder just above MERYL STREEPS head. I am not sure what Veronica was holding on to but the look on KEVIN SPACEY’s face tells a story!

We had a lovely interview afterwards with little TIM MASTERS from the BBC and hopefully they will show this on the 10 0’CLOCK NEWS.

Thank you to CUNNING AER LINGUS for slipping us in at the last minute. BRISTOL AIRPORT is perfect for TWO LADIESto fly from.

Yours Oscarly




What a lovely RUMMAGE for a Sunday morning. Veronica and I set forth for a VINTAGE FAYRE in a local HOSTELRY. We love a RUMMAGE, you never know what you will find.

Quite by accident we avoided the £1 entrance fee by going in a side door. To be fair this was not our fault as the lack of SIGNAGE made it almost impossible to find your way in.

An interesting selection of stalls and goods greeted us. Veronica is off like A GREYHOUND OUT OF A TRAP as she makes a quick sorty around the room, trying to spot a bargain. She is a very DISCERNING browser, Veronica and won’t buy just any old thing, it has to be right. She did make a purchase a small brown suitcase REDOLENT of PADDINGTON BEAR.

I purchased a rather smart STAINLESS-STEEL SPOUT for a wine bottle. We then intended to peruse the BOOT FAYRE but due to the inclement weather it was cancelled. As we started to drive away we spotted a small notice of a TABLE-TOP SALE in the hall next to SAINSBURYS, due to start in an hour.

Why not we thought and parked up and popped into SAINSBURYS for a lovely cup of tea, while we waited.

What a MISCELLANY of items were on display, that is if you could fight your way through the crowd to reach the stall. Veronica of course was off and running, ELBOWS FLYING, eyes darting THIS WAY AND THAT.

I followed on at a more sedate pace, contemplating the BARRY MANILOW COLLECTION alongside a GIFT SET for a man, comprising of a SET OF MINIATURE SKITTLES, a pack of cards, a bar of soap and a bottle of body lotion. WHY I ask myself?What was their reasoning in putting those items in the same gift box?

As we were leaving Veronica had her eye on a SLOW-COOKER, whilst two BETTY BOOP clocks had captured mine. They were on the same stall. I negotiated and purchased my clocks. Veronica did the same with her slow-cooker. I don’t know why but I feel I may use my clocks more than she will use her slow-cooker.

Yours Tick-Tockedly




What a lovely day, I was able to go out in just a cardigan, I do like a cardigan, and do some gardening.

I expect I am not alone in once I have started I get carried away, Ronald is always telling me to slow down. He is such a SILLY-BILLY , us ladies know that we can keep going far longer than you occasional gentlemen. We are even HAPPY DOING IT ON OUR OWN.

Ronald was VACUUMING and cleaning the inside of my little SOFT-TOP FIAT 500, he is such a dear. So I thought I would take the opportunity of SAWING a ROGUE branch off my WEEPING CHERRY. I thought to have had it done by the time Ronald was finished, otherwise he would have insisted on doing it.

Just a little problem I could not use my right hand as my shoulder is too painful so I attempted it with my left. I had the CO-ORDINATION of a DRUNKEN SAILOR which did not help but with PERSEVERANCE I managed to get the SAW STUCK halfway through whilst trying to support the heavy branch and stop it falling on any plants, all the time BALANCING on the edge of a wall.

It was at this point that I realised I was STUCK! I couldn’t let go of the SAW, I couldn’t let go of the BRANCH and my arms were feeling as if they would drop off.

I peered over the top of the FENCE across the PARK and across the FIELDS to where I could see my dear friend Teresa’s house, wondering if she would be looking across to the VILLAGE in her BINOCULARS. She does like to keep an eye on us all and if she was SPYING , I mean looking, then she might see my PLIGHT.

You will be relieved to know that Ronald came out to fetch something from his shed and RESCUED me; which was necessary but still made me cross.

Yours Weedily


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