EYE-PATCH FOR A MINON WEDDING
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, this week I have only been venturing out in DARK GLASSES. Well it has been SUNNY I hear you say and you would be right! That however is not the reason I am wearing SUNGLASSES and only going out after DARK.
I have turned into a MINION!
I HAVE ONE RED-EYE and not in a PHOTOGRAPH!
It was a present from WALES, I think I would have rather had a STICK OF ROCK.
The timing is perfect I am going to a WEDDING next week!
If any of you have an EYE-PATCH for OCCASION WEAR, please please may I borrow it?
SOMETHING FISHY IN THE LADYGARDEN! Yes my dear ladies and occasional gentleman I must confess to there being something fishy in the LADYGARDEN.
But WHERE was it and more importantly WHAT was it?
I first noticed it in the kitchen and after following the SCENT like a BLOODHOUND, I realised I had to VENTURE further. Into the UTILITY room.
It had a distinctly FISHY AROMA which stopped me DEAD!
Was I FOLLOWING the SCENT or was the SCENT FOLLOWING me?
Oh the RELIEF when I spotted the CULPRITS.
Oh the things you do for your GRANDCHILDREN.
These CACOTOPIA CANCRIFORMS have been removed from the premises!
VIGIL FOR FRUITY VAGILITY!
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, I fear Ronald is a little PREVIOUS. Since our return from BEAUTIFUL WELSH WALES to the EQUALLY BEAUTIFUL DEVON he has held a VIGIL.
Not a great FRUIT lover, being more of a VEGETABLE man I have had to work hard to convince him of the MERITS of GROWING our own FRUIT.
Having given in and PLANTED the STICKS, he now SITS and awaits the FIRST FRUIT!
GETTING TO GRIPS WITH SEAMEN.
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, one of the HIGHLIGHTS of our WELSH adventure was a BOAT TRIP to CALDEY ISLAND. The island is home to CISTERCIAN MONKS who delightfully make PERFUME & CHOCOLATE. What more could a LADY want.
Or a gentleman, Ronald was rather taken with ‘CALDEY FOR ,MEN’ I’m only hoping he doesn’t take to wearing a WHITE ROBE and SHAVING the top of his head!
The boat trip was great FUN especially getting IN and OUT with SEAMEN, what a SALTY FIRM GRIP!
I AM BEING HAUNTED BY THE WELSH ACH-A-FI! Having returned from a SOJOURN in WELSH WALES, for the past TWO DAYS all I can hear in my head are WELSH ACCENTS! And if I’m not careful, I find I’m speaking like it myself POPTY PING!
There You Are Then
SEASONAL VIP SPENDS R & R AMONGST THE ROSES
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, my dear friend Veronica and I visited RHS ROSEMOOR’S ROSE WEEKEND.
The weather was glorious as we were WAFTED by the FRAGRANT ROSES as we SAT and SIPPED a glass of ‘EL MURO’ 2012 MACABEO.
Now I’m not saying it was the WINE but as we sat on the patio and looked out over the VERDANT and FLORAL gardens, a MOBILITY scooter trundled along. Sitting ASTRIDE in a JAUNTY fashion was a VERY IMPORTANT PERSON who you only generally see on the night of the 24th of December.
He was INCOGNITO and wearing ‘NORMAL’ clothes but there was no mistaking the FLOWING WHITE HAIR AND BEARD.
I’m not DOBBING him in.
It’s nice to think he spends a little R & R amongst the ROSES in his downtime.
FOUR FRUITY STICKS BARE ALL !
My dear ladies and occasional gentleman, I responded to a GREAT DEAL l I saw online: ’4 DWARF FRUIT TREES THREE APPLE & ONE PEAR FOR £19.99 FREE POSTAGE’. How could I resist, I had all ready purchased a little PEAR TREE locally and thought these would be ideal to assist me in creating a little ORCHARD in my FRONT GARDEN.
This is my FIRST PURCHASE:
These are my ONLINE PURCHASE:
According to Ronald I have bought FOUR STICKS!
When we arose this morning, Ronald said ” I’m off to pick some fruit for breakfast”
There may be quite a lot of LADYGARDEN BREAKFASTS before Eve can pick Adam an apple!
P.S. Apologies for presentation, wordpress decided to do it’s own thing. It’s been a rough couple of days. I received an OUTSTANDING BILL for £400 for my deceased mother, a purchaser of my online auction item of ‘a child’s vintage pram for RESTORATION’ for which they paid £7.99 decided it wasn’t MUSEUM quality and complained and I bought 4 sticks!